I hate straight people.
I organized all of the cigarettes behind the counter in rainbow order, and this one girl messed them up, so I joked, “Way to ruin my rainbow. Very homophobic of you,” and now I gotta talk to HR for accusing her of calling me slurs, apparently. Christ.
I’m free now, but I hardly feel it. you’ve been gone for years, you’ve moved on and you are happy. but I’m still here, still healing, still stuck with you in my head; scars the only evidence of your presence. I’m stuck with the sickening thought that you got away. you got away with everything
reasons to wake up tomorrow morning
- breakfast + coffee
- finding my next favorite song
- my mom’s smile
- the feeling of the sun against my face
- hearing my mom say, “i love you”
- the feeling when my face hits my pillow after a long day
- a long hot shower
- maybe it will rain and the sound of rain is soothing
- that new person i haven’t met yet
- staring at clouds and finding pictures in them
- the stars at night
- stepping on crunchy leaves
- ice cream
- sunsets
- the smell of my christmas tree
- dogs
- cats
- pets in general
- being cozied up with my space heater on and a blanket around me
- coloring books
- cute old people holding hands
- helping other people heal their relationship with food
- the feeling of grass underneath my feet
- i am strong
- i am enough
- i am loved
- i will be okay
- i’ll disappoint the people that love me by letting my illness win
- i will be happy one day
- this pain is temporary
- keep going
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